So yeah, thanks for making us wait ANOTHER FREKING 10 MILLION YEARS JUST TO FINISH THE ACADEMY PRODIGY DEVS!!!!!!!! >:(
Um...... I'm triggered
So yeah, sorry about that. Anyways, The Prodigy Devs (If you make that one word why does it sound like a DJ [ProdigyDevs] lol) have finally released part of the warden keystone pedestal. WHY. Just why. Why could you have just not done that weirdo academy archive quests? Why could you have not kept standard currency for all regions? WHY?!?!?!? JUST PLEASE! we have already waited 5 million years for you to finally release the academy and now you are making us wait LONGER??????? uggh I'm mad. Anyways, let's get to the real thing of this post
All roasts and stuff in this post are JUST FOR FUN. I don't actually mean anything.
Meet the creepo Florian
So why is he Flora's sister? Where are their parents? Better yet, WHERE IS THE REST OF THEIR RACE??? I mean, come on. Florian and Flora are apparently the only ones in their race, so at least give us a decent backstory. What, random disease? I don't buy it.... and Flora ... what are you hiding in that tree on the home screen of your area that we can never go into by has a door? Is it the secret entrance to your civilization's underground society? CONSPIRACY. lol. Also, is he a teenager?? His hairstyle definitely implies that. And why does he have earings?
AND LOOK AT HIS CREEPY SMILE!!!!! SOOOO CREEPY.... "HEHEHEHEHE IM A CRAZY PUPPET MASTER SPY WHO IS ALSO A WARDEN AND IMMA SIDE SMIRK AT YOU TO SLOWLY GAIN YOU TRUST"...lol. Don't trust him...
What is that red amulet he is wearing??????? Hmmmm... I think you are actually Puppet Master's secret spy. But whatever, let's move on to the next roast.
Slurpy is weird
So yeah... Slurpy likes in a fire climate. And since he's made of water, shouldn't he like, turn to steam? And how do we survive, for that matter? What, do all prodigy clothes come in with free built-in heatproof and waterproof features(We never get wet after going underwater in Shipwreck shore)? Oh, and free built-in breathing features too to breathe in the sky? It's a little suspicious, don't you think? And similarly to Flora and Florian (Their still weird creepos) why are Slurpy and Scientist Slimerella (Lamplight Town) the only ones of their race? Celeboni is supposed to be the same race, but he doesn't look like it... I mean, slurpy and scientist slimerella are both made of slime or water substance something. So why?
Slurpy and Florian are weird, but Scoog is weirder
So yeah, Scoog is the only one of his race. Is he actually a monster in disguise? A science experiment gone wrong? IS HE ACTUALLY A DINOSAUR WHO SURVIVED? DINOSAUR HYBRID??? And what's with the monocle? I mean, we aren't in England solving a crime like Sherlock Homes, Scoog. And you're not Watson either. Hmmph. So... How come the ground is suspiciously repacked with more fossils each time we play? Are you just taking our money for fossils you actually found? And why do you get to give us a time limit? WE PAY YOU....
Oh, and that robot from the game in lamplight town is even weirder
So yeah, that robot we got is controlled by us and
the robots on the other platforms are controlled by other players or they sync automatically with our robot and the dance options we choose. So who controls the announcer guy???? and how does he give us gears? IS HE MURDERING OTHER ROBOTS AND SECRETLY GIVING US THEIR BODIES TO COVER HIS CRIME????? Hmmmmm... Interesting. Oh, and why are you more bulky? Why do you have a different face? Do you control which random cards why have to click? I want to freestyle my dance... you can't stop me except you can and ...uh i ran out of stuff. Oh well.
Finally, the weirdest of them all, is... Swoopy
So, Swoopy. Who are you? I mean, you keep saying our adventure will begin, but you fooled us the first time and then after that the ProdigyDevs (First album coming soon lol) gave us the academy. BUT IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU ISLAND!!!! And if you had a village, where are your people? I mean, there is Harvey, but I think he is a traveler, not a village man. Did your people all die? Cause if so, puppet master is gonna pay hard. But I don't think so. Very suspicious...